You okay?

Everything hurts.

I feel like my vagina just ejected a semi truck.

I definitely saw some stuff down there that I can't unsee, so.

Oh, yeah?

I mean, um, it was, it was, it was beautiful, my love, of course.

That's the miracle of life, brother.

You're in it now.

Yeah, well, I just need a shower and to sleep.

Well, we'll be home in a few minutes, and we'll be able to rest and relax with our little one.

[scoffs] You will never rest again, my friend.

[phone buzzing] Why does my mom keep calling me?

You told them not to come, right?

Like, you said, "Do not come," out loud?

Uh, they know, okay?

Uh, of course, I did.

It was very clear.

I told them not to come.

Okay.

[baby babbling] Okay.

[baby cooing] Uh-oh.

-What?

What the hell, Sandeep?

You said you were gonna handle this.

I, I, I did, okay?

I told them not to come.

I, I said that you didn't want them to- -You threw me under the bus?

No, no, no, no, no, no.

I'm so sorry.

That's not what I meant.

-Sir, right here is fine.

Thank you.

Peace and quiet.

That is what we said.

I know.

I know.

I understand, but it- it's probably just a misunderstanding but you know how your mom is.

Oh, my mom?

[phone buzzes] That's not what I meant.

Uh, speaking of which, 14 missed calls.

[phone continues to buzz] -14 too many.

[sighs] You know what?

It's fine.

It's totally fine.

I got through giving birth.

I can get through this.

[excited cheering and yelling] [excited cheering and yelling] [laughter] Hi Ma.

Ay!

What took you so long?

We've been waiting for hours.

You shouldn't have been waiting at all.

[gasps] Ay, mira my little Alice.

Aloe, Mama, Aloe.

I remember, like the plant.

Yeah, why Aloe?

Why not Cactus, huh?

Ay, mi sobrinita tan bella.

Oh, I don't know.

That's a word that I would ever use.

Claro, no tan linda como Carmela Ow!

Can't catch me now, loser.

Ay!

Shh!

She's sleeping.

Carmela, basta ya, que vas a despertar a tu prima.

Give me the baby, please.

Ay mi----, ay, mi--- niña!

Aguantale la cabeza.

Ay, la cabeza.

[bickering and yelling] Como es que eres madre sin saber Can I have the baby, please?

Mimi.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

You know that I said I don't want want any photos of her on the internet.

But what about your cousins in Cuba that can't be here?

They have a right to see her, too, Ana.

No seas egoista.

Oh yeah, that's gonna scare the primos away.

Is that a filter?

Does your baby have jaundice?

Goddammit.

Beta, congratulations.

Oh, my poor boy.

I'm sorry you had to be there all by yourself.

It was a little traumatic.

Oh, it was traumatic for you?

Why, 'cause you got 24 stitches and an adult diaper?

You can handle it.

It's harder for men.

Don't worry Beta, mummy is here.

I made your favorite kitchari.

You did?

Um, I mean, uh, you know, Anna's feeling really tired today, so maybe some other time.

-Sandeep, we're not leaving.

[mothers chuckling] Vamos, Ana.

A ver a Tia Lola.

-No, no, no, no, Mami.

-Si, Si, A ver la familia.

Ay, Alice.

Aloe, Mami.

Aloe!

Pobrecita, con ese nombre.

[chuckles] Carmela, no pegues a tu hermano!

-Mami.

-Mira la niña!

[joyful laughter] -No, no, no!

[dramatic yelling] -Tony!

Mira la nena.

-Ay -Ay, Dios mio... -Dejame ver a Alice.

Ay!

pero es un poco negrita, no?

-Ay, por Dios, Lola.

-Ay, Tia, no seas racista.

-Yo no soy racista.

Solo digo lo que veo.

-Her generation is a dying breed -Sofia, que dijiste?

-Que hay mucho que aprender de las personas mayores.

-Everyone, everyone, a toast.

My Ana has finally given me a grandchild.

Salud!

[in unison] Salud.

Salud.

-And to a little brother.

Hopefully soon.

-We are not having any more kids.

-Oh, why not?

Your boss won't let you?

-Well, at least I have a boss.

-There you go.

-Ana, don't pick on your sister.

Sofia is right.

-Ha!

We never thought you were gonna have a child with that job of yours.

-Have you told them you are leaving?

-I am not leaving!

-Huh?

-Reshma, I love my job.

I- [scoffs] we've already talked about this.

Sandeep is gonna help around the house.

-Beta, no.

He loves his job.

-He does not love his- -Well, I- I- it's not set in stone yet.

You know, we're still figuring things out.

-Are we?

-mija, Reshma is right.

You're a mom now.

That is the most important job in the world.

Yes, and I can be a mom and employed.

-[chuckles] After you've experienced the joy of motherhood, you won't want to go back.

-Motherhood is so rewarding, Ana Emilio!

Voy a contar hasta tres.

Uno!

Give, give me the stick.

Give it to me Give it to me [groans] Anna, I brought you this goat liver.

If you eat it, she'll be strong and rich.

Reshma, you know that we're vegan.

Nonsense, Anna.

You can't be vegan.

You have a baby now.

What?

-Ew.

I think Aloe Vera just s**** herself.

-Oh, no, she's fine.

It's probably just your breath.

-But she's gonna need a change soon.

Anna, did you get diapers?

-Sandeep did.

He's such a good dad.

-He literally just asked Alexa to do it.

-Oh, Anna, don't get upset.

I am not upset.

-Aha, there she is, my newest granddaughter.

Hello, Ali.

-Aloe!

-Aloe.

-Aloo, as in potato?

-Dad, what are you wearing?

Well, Reshma has been so busy cooking for you two, she didn't have time to do my laundry, so we brought it here.

-Is that mine?

-Mm-hmm.

Anna, where did you get this robe?

The material is very high quality.

Beta, you are out of detergent.

Ask the Alexa to buy you some.

[loud crash] [slow footsteps] [gasp] Aunti G!

what happened to my kitchen?!

- ?

- oat milk - !

-I promise I will help clean up -you love your job?

-That's not what I- -Where's my little Alice?

-She's in here, Mom.

-Ah, you little b****!

Listen, you have to get them out of here right now.

-Ana, they are just trying to help.

They made all this food.

-Oh, trying to help.

You only think that because you, you don't have to do anything because your mother treats you like a little baby.

But guess what, Sandeep?

We have a baby now.

You don't get to be the baby.

[baby cooing] -I am not a baby, okay?

I am an independent, responsibl- -Oh, God -Who is fully capable!

Oh!

-What?

What!

-Oh, my God, I think she's sick.

-No, no, it was just a sneeze.

-Well, what do you do?

What do you mean, what do you do?

Its a sneeze!

-What.

Do.

We.

Do?

-What are you [stammers] -Mom?

-Mom..?

-Mom.

Ay, Dios mío.

-Oh!

-Is she's sick already?

Ay, mi pobrecita.

Oh, no wonder.

Shes freezing cold!

-Sofia, get me a blanket!

-It is 90 degrees.

This will warm her up.

Ay, Mami, no.

She doesn't need overheat.

Ana, don't you think I know when a baby is cold?

-ugh.

Mommy!

-She is definitely sick.

-She is not sick.

We should go to the doctor.

Definitely back to the hospital.

She is fine.

This is not an emergency.

But my mom thinks she's sick.

And this is not their baby.

This is our baby.

Ay, Ana, don't get upset.

Ah, she's getting upset.

I am not upset.

Your mom's right.

Calm down.

You are supposed to be on my side.

Por Dios, Ana.

Don't be so sensitive.

There are no sides.

We're family.

If you don't do something right now, I swear I will tell your mother that you begged to be a stay-at-home dad [chattering] Uh, a- all right, everyone.

Uh, now that you have, have seen the baby, uh, you can all- -Stay for dinner!

But mom hates Tia Ana's cooking.

-AH!

GOAL!!

[joyous laughter] Everybody, thanks for coming, but Anna and I need to rest, so please leave.

[loud upbeat music, cheers, and conversation] [chatting and celebrations continue] -Stop!

Enough!

[abrupt silence] Stop.

Take your goat!

Take your opinions.

Take off my robe and get out of my house!

-Maybe it's the hormones.

-It's definitely the hormones.

-Get OUT!

You know, stress is not good for the baby.

Ana.

No, no, no.

Youre doing great.

-Ay!

Ayudame!

Esperame!

[door shuts] [baby cooing] [door shuts] [baby cooing] [baby wailing] [baby wailing] -Ah s****!

[upbeat rhythmic music]